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첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^

FN-FAL | 조회 106 | 추천 0
  • 2017.01.12
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■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words.
■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer


▶ Topic :

It is more important to keep old friends than to make new friends.

▶ Your Answer :

A thought provoking current issue concerns whether keeping old friends is more important than making new friends. Some people argues that making new friendship is more valuable than maintaining current friendship. However, in my opinion, keeping old friends is more inportant than making new friends.

To begin with, it can be said that old friends are the best friends that already apprehend each other well. Even some tiny cracks can wholly break down the friendship, and the old friendship can mean that there are considerable understandings among friends. On the other hand, it takes some time for new friends to know each other thoroughly. Numerous factors such as individual characteristics, sexuality, or even birth places can be impediments for developing new friendship. On contrary, an old friendship means that old friends already understand hinderances among them or at least perceive those.

On top of that, if a person concentrates on making new friends, there are chances to lose friends a person already has. Making new friends takes some time and efforts, or money if needed because it is not easy. While focusing on making new friends, we can lose our interests on present friends. Concentrating on every single friend, including present friends and all new friends, is not realistically possible. That does not mean that making new friends is bad or arguable. But that surely means that pursuing only new friendship can be exhausting. Rather, concentrating on present friends can give us comfort because it at least does not exhaust current friends.

To sum up, olds friends already know each other heartfully. And making new friends might led to loosing some close friends. For these reasons, I firmly believe that keeping old friends has more merits than making new friends.
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92178 답글 [독립형] RE:열심히 수정하며 배우고 있습니다. 감사합니다. 첨삭 부탁 드려요. [1] vine 69 2017.01.21
92177 [독립형] 첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^ FN-FAL 105 2017.01.12
92176 답글 [독립형] RE:첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^ vine 70 2017.01.21
92175 답글 [첨삭] RE:독립형 첨삭 부탁드립니다. vine 63 2017.01.21
92174 [첨삭] 첨삭해주신다면 정말 감사하겠습니다!! 하늘 121 2017.01.12
92173 답글 [첨삭] RE:첨삭해주신다면 정말 감사하겠습니다!! vine 65 2017.01.21
92172 답글 [첨삭] RE:독립형 첨삭 부탁드립니다. vine 49 2017.01.21
92171 [독립형] 첨삭 부탁드립니다! 감사합니다. happylee 137 2017.01.12
92170 답글 [독립형] RE:첨삭 부탁드립니다! 감사합니다. vine 60 2017.01.21
92169 [첨삭] 독립형 첨삭#2 부탁드립니다. rachel_toefl100 114 2017.01.12
92168 답글 [첨삭] RE:독립형 첨삭#2 부탁드립니다. vine 62 2017.01.21
92167 [첨삭] 독립형 첨삭 #1 부탁드립니다. rachel_toefl100 101 2017.01.12
92166 답글 [첨삭] RE:독립형 첨삭 #1 부탁드립니다. 빗방울 59 2017.01.22
92165 [독립형] 현우의도전14 첨삭부탁드립니다! 현우 117 2017.01.12
92164 답글 [독립형] RE:현우의도전14 첨삭부탁드립니다! 빗방울 56 2017.01.22
>> [독립형] 첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^ FN-FAL 107 2017.01.12
92162 답글 [독립형] RE:첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^ 빗방울 44 2017.01.22
92161 [독립형] 첨삭 부탁드립니다. 감사합니다 ^^ chae 107 2017.01.12
92160 답글 [독립형] RE:첨삭 부탁드립니다. 감사합니다 ^^ 빗방울 48 2017.01.22
92159 답글 [첨삭] RE:처음 글 올려요! 첨삭 부탁드려요 빗방울 44 2017.01.22