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첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^

FN-FAL | 조회 94 | 추천 0
  • 2017.01.12
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■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words.
■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer


▶ Topic :

It is more important to keep old friends than to make new friends.

▶ Your Answer :

A thought provoking current issue concerns whether keeping old friends is more important than making new friends. Some people argues that making new friendship is more valuable than maintaining current friendship. However, in my opinion, keeping old friends is more inportant than making new friends.

To begin with, it can be said that old friends are the best friends that already apprehend each other well. Even some tiny cracks can wholly break down the friendship, and the old friendship can mean that there are considerable understandings among friends. On the other hand, it takes some time for new friends to know each other thoroughly. Numerous factors such as individual characteristics, sexuality, or even birth places can be impediments for developing new friendship. On contrary, an old friendship means that old friends already understand hinderances among them or at least perceive those.

On top of that, if a person concentrates on making new friends, there are chances to lose friends a person already has. Making new friends takes some time and efforts, or money if needed because it is not easy. While focusing on making new friends, we can lose our interests on present friends. Concentrating on every single friend, including present friends and all new friends, is not realistically possible. That does not mean that making new friends is bad or arguable. But that surely means that pursuing only new friendship can be exhausting. Rather, concentrating on present friends can give us comfort because it at least does not exhaust current friends.

To sum up, olds friends already know each other heartfully. And making new friends might led to loosing some close friends. For these reasons, I firmly believe that keeping old friends has more merits than making new friends.
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라이팅 게시판
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92166 답글 [첨삭] RE:독립형 첨삭 #1 부탁드립니다. 빗방울 53 2017.01.22
92165 [독립형] 현우의도전14 첨삭부탁드립니다! 현우 109 2017.01.12
92164 답글 [독립형] RE:현우의도전14 첨삭부탁드립니다! 빗방울 45 2017.01.22
>> [독립형] 첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^ FN-FAL 95 2017.01.12
92162 답글 [독립형] RE:첨삭 부탁드려요. 고맙습니다 ^^ 빗방울 41 2017.01.22
92161 [독립형] 첨삭 부탁드립니다. 감사합니다 ^^ chae 99 2017.01.12
92160 답글 [독립형] RE:첨삭 부탁드립니다. 감사합니다 ^^ 빗방울 40 2017.01.22
92159 답글 [첨삭] RE:처음 글 올려요! 첨삭 부탁드려요 빗방울 39 2017.01.22
92158 [통합형] 첨삭 부탁드립니다 ^^ (도배죄송해요!! ㅠㅠ) 읏쨔쨔 109 2017.01.12
92157 답글 [통합형] RE:첨삭 부탁드립니다 ^^ (도배죄송해요!! ㅠㅠ) 빗방울 50 2017.01.21
92156 [통합형] 토플 라이팅 공부는 첨 해봐요. 꼭 첨삭해주세요!!! +_+ 읏쨔쨔 113 2017.01.12
92155 답글 [통합형] RE:토플 라이팅 공부는 첨 해봐요. 꼭 첨삭해주세요!!! +_+ 빗방울 53 2017.01.21
92154 [통합형] 첨삭부탁드립니다. 미리 감사합니다!! 읏쨔쨔 99 2017.01.12
92153 답글 [통합형] RE:첨삭부탁드립니다. 미리 감사합니다!! 빗방울 48 2017.01.21
92152 [통합형] 첨삭부탁드립니다. 감사해요 :) 읏쨔쨔 94 2017.01.12
92151 답글 [통합형] RE:첨삭부탁드립니다. 감사해요 :) 빗방울 37 2017.01.21
92150 [통합형] 통합형 첨삭 부탁드려요. 감사합니다. Myoryeo 105 2017.01.12
92149 답글 [통합형] RE:통합형 첨삭 부탁드려요. 감사합니다. 빗방울 40 2017.01.21
92148 [독립형] 내년 크리스마스는 행복하실거에요. 첨삭 감사드립니다. Myoryeo 98 2017.01.12
92147 답글 [독립형] RE:내년 크리스마스는 행복하실거에요. 첨삭 감사드립니다. 빗방울 41 2017.01.21